The Beginning of the Beginning

[Half-Dragon]

Criticism is appreciated. Any grammar/spelling, let me know. I'll update regularly. Short updates, but regular hopefully. Dates listed are the day of the update. I know a lot of it is still very vague, but I'm trying to wait for something really solid so I don't get too far away from the game's premise.

"Hell on Earth"
26/01/06
1)At First a Battle Within

No one expected it. Some said it was prophecy long since written. Others, that it was judgement for the wicked. But everyone agreed- it was every nightmare come true. It was hell on earth. The ferocity and mercilessness of the Demons coupled with the ineffectiveness of conventional arms were staggering to the human brain. Days and weeks before the gates opened, people began going missing all across the globe. It was an international crises that needlessly weakened us as a race before our darkest hour. Every country fingered others, accusing one another of terrorism and hate crimes. Little did we dream the true fate of our compatriots. I don't remember dreaming, anymore... The Harbingers- the Demons that preceded the invasion- began collecting sacrifices, harvesting unwilling souls. Blood rites were performed to open gates from our realm to theirs. The ensuing flood of evil was so staggering, our race could barely begin to fight back before most were dead.

We all lost so much those first days, the willpower to even try and fight back went unheeded in most. It seemed better to succumb to death by one's own hand then have your soul stolen by those monsters. I had nearly been taken for a sacrifice- but had escaped with my body intact, if not whole. Instead of me, those creatures had taken the woman I love. Loved, so everyone keeps insisting. They had taken my life without killing me. Like the others, I had contemplated taking the easy way out. Our weapons should be used for something, they don't work on them. But as I sat there gun in hand, ready for the end, the hope died inside my soul and something snapped. I had searched for her for so long with nothing to show. Praying she was not one of the bodies piled high at the sacrificial altars. Even in this dismal existence of sneaking like rats, I could be happy with her. But instead of pulling the trigger, I was filled with an anger- a vengeance so strong, I felt as if nothing mattered but the end of these beasts. The ultimate demise of every single creature not native to my world.

We began to make progress in finding their weaknesses. Technology continued to be enhanced with what little had been salvaged as the attack was initiated. Some military scientists had escaped their labs with the newest types of body armor known to man. Coupled with the best blacksmiths in the world, they found they could make armor that resisted the Demon's physical attacks. Those versed in Latin and those that studied ancient cultures had unearthed so much in recent years that was just now being translated. Ancient books in languages the greatest scholars did not recognize contained primeval arcana that was grafted into weapons and armor of use against the creatures. Thus, the most recent technology was melded with the oldest of the mystical arts. The products of the amalgamation were weapons and armor that could be used to fight back. And that's truly where my story begins...

28/01/06
2) Of Dreams and Men
"Xan! Xan! Wake up, man!" The voice rang out in my head. Through the hazy remnant of a lost nightmare, I woke to my best friend's persistant calling. "Today's the day."

I sat up immediately, all slumber fled from my now alert form. I vaguely remember something about the importance of stones, and a blood curdling scream as they took my girlfriend. I hated sleep now, nightmares plagued me throughout the night. I preferred to stay up and work on my sword forms or go down to the shooting range. Or read over arcane manuscripts until I was too exhausted to dream. I always did though. Always of her.

I stood up and looked in the mirror. Blonde hair kept short as an act of apathy. Blue eyes with dark circles around them from the lack of proper sleep. There was a time when some had called me handsome. It didn't matter what I looked like anymore. Just how I performed in the suit.

I threw on a set of clothes and laced up my boots, and headed out of my sardine-can of a bedroom. "Sleeping Quarters" the military nuts called them. Like my best friend. He met me on the way toward the armory and we walked side by side through the big double doors. Men surrounded a couple of tables where there was an assortment of objects not commonly found together. There were complex circuitry systems arrays built into nano-fiber woven titanium mesh armor, swords with electrical switches and firearms with potion reservoirs. This all seemed commonplace to us now, but years ago it would have seemed just sheer impossibility, if not nonsensical. We've trained for years and now the select few of us, those that seemed most qualified, would actually engage the enemy. Up close and personal. Not that this was the first expedition out to fight the creatures. Many had gone before us and fallen. That technology that went with them lost forever, unless newer teams reclaimed it. But we were the most prepared.

As we surveyed the objects laid before us, we steeled ourselves for the possibility of this being our last sight of what we now considered home.
I turned to one of my few real friends left on this disamal earth, "Ready for this, Dahvid?"
"Let's do this."

[northrop]

Names! Who’s “she”? Who is the main character? (Is it you?) I know it’s a prologue, but there are MANY questions.

It also reminds me of “Ninth Gate”.

Overall, it was pretty good.

[Killmojo]

Awesome story so far. I love the description of the weapons and armour being formed, very cool. I look forward to the rest.

[HeadShot]

Very nice, Kinda reminds me of the Sword of Truth books

[Half-Dragon]

Odd... I read the sword of truth books, like 8 years ago.

[Sol Invictus]

Good stuff, I like it.

[HeadShot]

good books eh?

[Half-Dragon]

Newest Section!!! Read the very first post if you didn't yet! And theres gotta be a better place for these Fan Fics so they aren't all broken up... Hope you guys like it.

02/02/06
3)Iron Man
I pull the microweave titanium over my head like a wool sweater. Due to a thin layer of magically augmented padding, the "fabric" doesn't shear off my skin. Likewise for the trousers. On contact the top and bottom interweave and become one. The titanium "second skin" transfers power and information throughout the suit, giving feedback through the helmet via Heads-Up-Display (HUD). Due to a meticulous weave structure, the titanium casts shadows upon itself in all but the brightest light making it effectively black in our fighting conditions. Plate armor can be attached to the suit through magnetism and sorcery. I opt for the most plate possible without overloading the system. I expect and intend to be in melee combat.

The top and bottom outer-most armor is held together by a magnetic gasket, acting as a belt. The belt's main function though, is providing
extra-dimensional "holsters" for weapons and item. A neural link allows the suit to be pieced together until the helmet is equipped, at which
point the armor's various sections glow with light. Gauntlets fit over the hands and allow for nearly full dexterity, the heavy greaves onto legs that would be crushed without suit augmented strength.

As I finish with my armor, Dahvid is already suited up with weapons, and is double-checking his sights. The lights of his suit are a threatening red, his helmet design akin to an addition symbol, a crosshairs without the circle. He doesn't wear much plate, preferring maneuverability over protection. Dahvid uses firearms almost exclusively, unless the situation absolutely does not permit it. His ability with magic is expressly for augmenting his shooting, and even his melee weapon is, in essence, a ranged weapon: a fold out, ultra-ionized staff that keeps enemies away even when firearms didn't. He uses it with skill, but much prefers either the spark rifle --which houses a miniaturized tesla coil that fires ultra-dense ozone in automatic, as an assault rifle, or single rounds that function as a sniper rifle-- or the cluster rifle... which is really just an ultra effective rocket launcher.

We are complete opposites. I prefer to feel the demons die as I cleave them in half. A Nodachi is effectively a Japanese greatsword, with a
longer thicker blade than a Katana. The one I use in combat was reportedly used in the fifth century BC to kill Oni. It's name translated to Daybreak or Dawn or something like that. I don't know if the story is true, but it kills demons really well and no one cast any spells on it. I am quick to use spells to remind those things not to screw with me- not that they ever learn. And, if the situation just doesn't call for a big sword, I carry the prototype tempest rifle. It uses superconductivity to propel magnetized particles in a random pattern from the muzzle... It's a lightning shotgun. It is effectively a close range weapon also, but that's why Dahvid's got my back. When I place my helmet on my head, my suit lights glows a celestial gold, the helmet design like a jagged X.

The armor is very versatile, and parts can be interchanged on the fly- including the helmet due to the neural link. The second-skin works as a motherboard and the rest of the armor as the hardware. Ten years ago this armor would have made a man invincible. Now we're hoping it'll be effective enough.

There are several read-outs "on screen" in the helmet, while others are impressed directly upon my consciousness. It reads trajectory and
velocity of potential threats in the room, but due to over clocked spectral scanners nothing registers as harmful. Dahvid would have if the suits weren't networked together. We have live audio to one another. My voice can be broadcast directly to him if I only will it to be.

The chief walked over with that fatherly look in his eyes to give us our briefing. He was a General in the Pentaic conflict. When asteroids headed past the earth containing precious element rich cores, all the countries rushed to put rockets in the sky. No major battles occured, but his company saw the worst of the conflicts, on the surface of an asteroid. Needless to say he's the most qualified to lead us.

"Now remember, in the train tunnels there should be some stalkers crawling around, but nothing you can't take real easy like. They would be small to get past the heavy defense systems. Now outside our perimeter is where things will probably start gettin' hairy. Right before the last scouts stopped comin back, we got a report of increased harpy activity. Who knows what that means? If it gets too ugly, you boys comeback, ya hear? And remember what to do if you find Somsien"

"We know," we say in unison, like impatient children.
He just nodded and we walked into the first "airlock" between the inside and the "outside." The door closed behind us and sealed with a
whoosh like that of a pneumatic clamp. The darkness was the first taste of the Abyss. Just before the door opened ahead of us, "Hey Xander..." With a loud shuffle in this tiny chamber, I look over at my friend, at a red-glowing cross in the darkness, a metal visage that I recognize as well as his true face. I can vaguely see his armor reflecting the golden hued light of the X that crosses my helm. "Boo."

[Half-Dragon]

Feedback is super appreciated and encouraging- good or bad, you read the story.

[northrop]

thumbs up!

[Killmojo]

It certainly shows a lot of potential. There are certainly no spelling or punctuation errors, but perhaps you could find someone to read through it just in case they can perhaps word a sentence or two differently. But as it stands, it it still very good.

[HeadShot]

without suit augmented stength


Is stength suppose to be strength? Other then that the story is great!

[Half-Dragon]

Hey everyone, sorry there for no new posts yet, my harddrive died. My compy needs to be reformatted, but I don't have an XP home CD. I'll try and update from somewhere else.

[Sol Invictus]

They're now online at Hellgate Guru:
http://www.hellgateguru.com/fanfic-tbotb01.php
http://www.hellgateguru.com/fanfic-tbotb02.php

[brandnewyork]

Its very good, well organized

[RetRockhardt]

the willpower to even try and fight back went unheeded in most.

This sentance doesn't quite make sense. A person's willpower can fall dormant, and a call/warning can go unheeded but willpower can't really go unheeded.

Besides that little note, I quite like how this is going. Nice work.

[Sol Invictus]

Yeah, that's the one line that irked me. The rest of the story had a good flow to it.

[Craq]

thumbs up!

Very vivid stuff there H/D ,very enjoyable!!

[Half-Dragon]

Hey, everybody! Sorry it's been like forever, but it's been hard as hell (sorry for that) to update without my computer working (still). I just felt like I owed everyone, at least Sol, for making a big deal of it. I was hoping to make this combat section long and epic, but due to college exams, and the lack of a good compy, they'll have to be more brief then I would like. Also, sorry for any spelling mistakes, it's late, and this keyboard sucks. Lastly, deal with the cheesy comic book sound effects, it just adds... something.
Well, here we go...

20061802 <- (Military Dating for those that don't know)
4)It's Always Darkest Just Before it's Pitch Black
*Zzzzow Zzzzow* Bright blue lightning slugs whiz by my head, impacting stalkers' chests or heads as I cut others down in a semi-circle to my front. To put it kindly, a stalker is a panther with the face of a piranha and spikes coming out of just about anywhere they'd be inconvienient for an attacker. They can grip any surface, in defiance of gravity, and can jump like a kangaroo. Add skin like that of a crocodile, but thicker by far, and you've basically got a stalker. Now take all those animals and burn them alive- that's the sounds and the smells you get from the beasts.

I wield my nodachi with the ease of katana to a samurai. Yet the increased weight of the weapon, coupled with my augmented strength, allows me to cut clean through the thick hide. The longer reach and the suit targeting system gives me the edge I need to not get swarmed by dozens of the things. The wide blade flickers with light, though none is cast upon it. *Shhiiik* A head here *Shhiiik* a leg or two there. Sometimes I can cut them in half if I can get the angle right. They jump or sprint toward me, from above and left and right, uncaring that I have just cut down dozens before them. I'd assume they err in ignorance rather than bravery. Due to tunnel collapses and wrecked train cars, they could avoid the heavy defense systems around our base. And now that we are out here, they have plenty of places to surprise me from.

*Zzzow*"Why don't you shoot a little closer to me, Dahvid? They're not registering as hits to my suit yet."
I jibe him as he saves me from a heavier beating than I'm already taking. My smirk is knocked off my face as I get hit with the force of a line-backer from behind. A man would be snapped in half by the least of their attacks. With the armor, even a big stalker isn't much of a threat.

"How about you take your skirt off and start using a gun?" He says as the weight on my back is alleviated as he blasts the creature off, "Then maybe you wouldn't be getting your ass kicked."

"Oh," I say as I take out my gun, "Are you insinuating I am a girl? Last I remember, Areal beat you sensless the last time you sparred."
Chik-chik The pump action is a resistance primer, that makes each shot more powerful. I wait until two are in the air, dangerously close to me, to discharge the energy. *Bzzzewt* With a bright yellow flash, the magnetic field-charge tears through their skin and launches them away from the muzzle and away from me. *Chik-chik**Bzzzewt*

"I let her win," he says as he walks toward me, still firing. *Zow Zow*
"Is that why she had you on the ground, with you begging to be let up?"
*Zzzow**Bzzzewt* The last stalker fell as Dahvid strode up to stand next to me. I put my gun against my shoulder pointing to the sky, and face him with a smirk I know he can feel.
"That's bull, dude."
"Whatever..." I say, as I walk toward the ledge of a plateau that is the end of our perimeter. I jump down, not picking anything up on my scanners, hoping there won't be a "friendly" welcome. I laugh as he jumps down after me.

[Half-Dragon]

sorry for the lack of updates, folks, my brother had a heart attack...

[HeadShot]

Sorry to hear that, but the story is awesome!

[Half-Dragon]

Hey guys, I worked on the next part for an hour between classes here at school, then I was about to send it and Internet Explorer had an error and quit. I'm pretty pissed, but I promise I'll update tonight. It's never as good when I have to re-write it. Dammit.

[northrop]

That sucks dude. I’ve had that happen to me before a few times. Thank god my school uses firefox. Anyway… you’re right about the other thing too, re-writes are never as good.

[Nezerv]

Bummer :(. But i look forward to the next part. Keep it up Half-Dragon.

[Half-Dragon]

Finally... Writing a story in present tense is confusing. Sorry for any grammatical/person mistakes. Hope you like it. And please, give me any kind of feedback.

20062002
5)The Enemy of my Enemy could still be my Enemy

The plateau formed a "natural" border, a physical deterrence to the demons. Earthquakes shook the city when the hellgates opened, creating a new landscape that made the city unrecognizable in some places. I prefer that to finding an area that is "normal." Subconsciously I believe I'm safer in a house or man-made building, which has led to some ugly encounters in the past. I'm lucky to be alive; the suits were not nearly as refined in those days.
Dahvid and I move along tentatively, weapons at the ready down a street with asphalt torn to shreds and stone and brick from collapsed buildings strewn across our path. Regardless of how finely-tuned the suit scanners are, we get surprised all the time. I was once again wielding my Nodachi, holding it off to my right side and pointing back. Dahvid has switched his rifle to full-auto for the close quarters, aiming from the hip.
"Are you picking anything up?" I whisper to Dahvid, unable to trust the suit's sound dampener. We keep moving forward to where the last scouts reported activity. Our HUDs displayed a minimap based on the scout helmets' smart cards. The last activity was on our current position.
"No... not exactly. Every now and then I get a spike on the Geiger counter. You see that?"
I bring up my Geiger meter and spectrometer and note the random spikes to the immediate North West of our position, about twenty feet away. It isn’t a demon signature… but it doesn’t have any spectromic signature at all. I look around with every light filter built into the suit but read no movement or heat signature except from the small fires that still run rampant throughout the city.
“Maybe it’s a downed suit…?” I say, looking for any explanation that isn’t a new kind of demon.
“We don’t have reports of anyone downed in this sector, not that weren’t reclaimed…”
Just like that, the readings stopped.
“We’ve got harpies to deal with, we’ll look around on the way back. Probably…” I knew we probably won’t have a chance to check on the way back. We often were sprinting for our lives if we were going back to base.
We keep walking northward down the street, and I notice how even more of the buildings were destroyed now than the last time we were here, and almost all the doors were blocked off or collapsed in. The demons don’t seem to like when we duck into buildings for cover or retreat. They are often too big or unwieldy to maneuver indoors. Occasionally, I step around a dresser or bathtub that is sitting in the middle of the street. We would sometimes come out for salvage runs when we found something really useful.
The street made a sharp left-hand turn, where the building on the corner was toppled into the “elbow” providing excellent cover. Dahvid walked silently up to the edge of the building and scoped around it with his rifle. I primed my boot thrusters and scaled the wall with my trajectory computer.
“Two harpies to the right- three to the left, I can’t see past there. I’ve got a clear shot to the right. Go. Now!”
His suit transmitted the information to mine nearly instantaneously, and as he began to fire *Buzzuzzuzzuzzuzz* I leap over him and the wall to land in the middle of three surprised harpies. A harpy is a mix between a human female and a bat, about four feet tall. On fire.
I slice the first of a pair clear in half with a baseball bat style swing. The second of the pair loses a leg as it leaps into the air with a scream like that of a strangling hawk. The third, stunned up until this moment, lets out a nails-on-chalkboard fire breathing scream as it leaps at my face. I can feel the heat even through the suit, but manage to duck the razor sharp talons. As it passes over my back, I bring Dawn in a full arc from underneath my body into an overhead cleave that sees the removal of one of the creature’s wings and drives it to the ground. I quickly “put out” its head like a cigarette, with an over sized boot. Dahvid fires at the one that got away, but fails to hit it with his weapon in automatic mode. By the time he switches it to single-shot, the beast has descended into the buildings.
“That’s not going to be good,” I say, wishing I’d managed to kill it.
“Damn, we gotta get outta here. Dammit…” he says as he fires a few rounds into his already downed foes out of frustration.
“There should have been more harpies here, though. What happened to the rest of them?” I say, knowing he has as little of an idea as I do. As we search the area for clues we find several freshly perforated and mangled harpy corpses. “This doesn’t make any-”
Before I finish what I am saying, we hear a guttural laughing from around the next turn in the city streets. We watch as five minions appear from around the bend about 70 feet away. They are speaking in demonic as they approach. Three of the minions have the biggest stalkers I’ve ever seen attached by a large metal leash to their shoulders, like they are walking their dogs. Minions are humanoid in shape- the text in our briefings read: “…hulking, brutish creatures with a disturbing mouthful of razor-sharp teeth for a head.... Minions employ demon-crafted weaponry that attaches directly to the ends of their arms, replacing their hands in some cases…”
We had fought one at a time before, but these odds did not look good. The one-legged harpy flies close by them, approximating a laugh, seeming gleeful at our imminent demise. The minion closest the harpy suddenly cut it from the sky. That explained the other corpses. Bigger demons do whatever they want.
“We can’t take all five, can we? Or run? ” I ask, knowing he’s a better strategist.
“Maybe. But not with the stalkers. They’d be on us in a second.”
I take out my tempest rifle, and begin the words of a fireshield spell. Dahvid switches over to his cluster rifle and chants an accuracy mantra. We take what cover we can and wait as they walk into optimal range.
“It’s been fun, huh?”
“As fun as hell,” he says with a chuckle, even now.
The Geiger counter was reading at full.

[HeadShot]

WOW, must know what happens!!!

[Nezerv]

Very nice! keep it up :).

[not all tHERE]

:lol: You better try hard to top that last chapter, my boy. I hope you can pull it off, looking forward to the next few additions to your story, Stranger. :lol: HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH...

[13hades13]

great story halfdragon, keep it up.

and welcome to the boards not all there. your quote is one of my all-time favorites by the way.

[Half-Dragon]

Awesome- glad you guys are enjoying the story. The feedback really inspires me to get my next chapter out asap. Plus, I tentatively have a little surprise for all my fans. I don't wanna say what in the circumstance that things don't work out.
Sorry this isn't the next chapter, though...

[Sol Invictus]

Intense reading. I really enjoyed it. Oh and for what it's worth, I'm really sorry to hear about your brother.

[Half-Dragon]

Hopefully I'll have everything I want for the next update soon. Sorry to keep you guys waiting.

[not all tHERE]

:lol: Well it's good to see you're still among us lad. We are very much looking forward to your next chapter of this epic tale, and by we I mean me, of course. See ya soon.. :lol: HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH...

[Half-Dragon]

Well, my friend is still coming up with the "special features." Hopefully we'll have them next time. Here's the next chapter. Please give me feedback.

20060317
6) For Whom the Bell Tolls
“3”
It seemed now that the stalkers had picked up our scent. They were straining at their chains, making the blade minions they were attached to nearly stumble. The minions cursed in their vile tongue and yanked on the long chain leashes, eliciting a yelp from their pets.
Some of the blade minions were missing one of their hands in place of a large metallic claw grafted directly to the bone. The other hand was accompanied by a wrist gauntlet with a fixed jagged sword blade protruding from it. There were even those that had pincers for both hands. These were more savage, their lust for carnage insatiable to the point of mutilating themselves beyond any semblance of reason. More dangerous again were the minions equipped for long range. While some still possess the metal claws, each has any sort of energy cannon grafted directly to the bones in its forearm. They would oft have one free hand to wield any sort of demonic or human weapon to suit their needs. Or, empty-handed, they would simply grab a man by his throat and take a good size chunk out of his head with their massive jaws. A sight witnessed by few surviving humans.
“2”
As they move slowly into range, we take aim to cause the most destruction. My fire shield spell will take effect at the first damage I receive, while Dahvid’s mantra begins at his first shot. While it is unlikely that we will survive, we have a very good chance of crippling their operation in this sector for some time. Maybe they’ll have operable suits ready by the time there is a problem again.
We both breath calmly- knowing any vibration, from sound or movement, could quickly alert the minions to our exact location. Having count-downs like this were a common occurance, so we both know to go after one and not on it… to go on zero.
“1”
As we both line up our final sights, our Geiger meters begin screaming in our helmets. The noise is so sudden, and so sharp, we both recoil in pain stifling a yell. The noise is like that of an antique “television set” from the turn of the century losing any signal at full volume. I can only imagine a nuclear weapon having gone off in our very close proximity to cause that kind of feedback spike.
Needless to say, we didn’t fire. As I shut down the Geiger and reclaim my bearings, I expect the demons to be on top of us… if we aren’t all about to be engulfed in nuclear flame. Yet what I see is beyond understanding.
The demons are attacking what appears to be each other. Firing chaotically into the center of their group or swinging at thin air as they each are constantly taking damage. The sound of automatic gunfire is easily distinguished amongst the sounds. I stare dumbfounded with no comprehension of what is happening.
“C’mon man! Let’s get out of here!” Dahvid says eagerly.
I hear him speaking without listening, noticing something wrong about the pandemonium I observe. The demons are not, in fact, attacking each other. They are attacking around each other, as if the very air were menacing them.
“We can take them. Let’s go,” Without waiting for his response, I draw my sword, prime my thrusters, and leap toward the combat, no more than twenty feet away. I bring my blade down to lop off a minion’s arm as I land. I notice each monster riddled with bullet wounds and long gashes across every part of their body. I notice the blade minion I am fighting is encumbered by the corpse of the stalker it was “walking.” It looks as if the beast’s skull has been pierced through with an invisible skewer. This extra weight provides me the handicap I need to quickly sidestep the minion’s thrust and remove its other arm with an upward swipe. Following through with that momentum, I spin around in a 360 and cut the thing in half at the waist. As I realign myself, I notice Dahvid’s rockets hailing down around the area, splashing the demons with explosive shrapnel.
More importantly, I notice a disembodied blade flickering in and out of existence around the surviving minions and stalkers. Likewise, the muzzle flash like that of a submachine-gun erupts from thin air around the vicinity.
The weapons seem to appear and disappear in the blink of an eye, from all around the area. They are never from the same place long and are always opposite the explosions. The blade slashes wildly at a minion’s torso while the gunfire tears apart a stalkers hide. I wade into the fray and begin to quickly dispatch the severely wounded enemies. I remove a head here and a leg there, my prey far too bewildered to put up any legitimate defense.
I quickly realize that they are all dead or dying on the ground around me. I also realize I didn’t kill them all.
I hear a clink and feel a sudden pressure against my chest plates. What appears to be a dueling pistol with several barrels materializes from front to back out of the air. An arm follows quickly behind, which is in turn followed by a body and head. The other hand holds a rapier in a non-threatening manner. In front of me stands a “clone” of my suit, with several distinct differences.
The helmet design is dark purple, as that of a black light, in the shape of what can only be explained as two sevens facing each other. A triangle pointing down with curved sides, split in half. Instead of titanium alloy, the suit is comprised of a crystalline structure. I know for a fact that it is a form of carbon- diamond. The diamond was specially treated to soften it for bending, then made into strands to weave the suit’s underlay. It was then made into plating for the suits fortification.
The suit is not nearly as durable as the one I wear. However, it allows much more freedom and flexibility due to its special treating. Also, the underlay is woven and the plates are bent in such a way that it is in effect a fiber optic shell. It can absorb light at the will of the wearer and effectively forms a “cloak” around the wearer. It renders them invisible. It can translate light into other wavelengths of energy i.e. infrared, x-rays. Beta-particle radiation.
I know all this because I helped design and build the suit.
“I told you I could pilot it the best,” an expectedly cocky remark from the man in front of me. He seems indifferent to the fact that Dahvid has his spark rifle almost pressed against the back of his skull.
“Hello Somsien.”

[Sol Invictus]

Hah, nice! I really love the violent descriptions. :D

[Nezerv]

Nice! keep it up :)

[Jennifer]

Nice! :D

And a plot twist too. Looking forward to the next chapter. :)

[Half-Dragon]

I'm glad you guys thought it was... nice. I hope everyone gives me some feedback.

[Jennifer]

Besides that I like it?

I'd suggest you space out your paragraphs a bit more; it kind of looks like one large paragraph, instead of several smaller ones. I generally double-enter after each paragraph myself to keep it clean.

Just a thought. :) Waiting for the next chapter.

[Sol Invictus]

Well there's nothing wrong with the story or anything, just the formatting. Perhaps I should have said so earlier, but I fixed it up for the main site, in any case.

Good job on the work.

[Half-Dragon]

Yeah you guys are right, it's usually so late when I'm done though, I just can't care. I suppose that the fact I start so late has something to do with that... I appreciate the feedback, thanks for all the support.

[Roland]

Came across your story a few days ago and thought it was very well done...looking forward to reading more. But no rush from me...writing (imo) is best done from the heart, not a time table ;)

Your imagery is good, and your dialog is original and most importantly believable. And yes first person can be tricky at times :)

Your fight scenes/descriptions remind me of Eric Van Lustbader's "The Sunset Warrior" trilogy as well as Michael Moorcock's "Elric" books...that's a pretty good compliment btw heh, and good reading if you ever are in the need.

Good luck with everything...and I'm glad your continuing the story!

Best Regards,

[Half-Dragon]

Hey everyone, sorry for the lack of updating. Exams and all that. Soon hopefully.

[Half-Dragon]

Hey everyone, sorry it's been so long, I had exams... then i worked 10 hour days during my spring break. now I'm back in the swing and I promise an update on thursday. hope you guys haven't lost interest.

[Half-Dragon]

Hope this is acceptable to all you action junkies out there, the next update should be quicker to come than this one.

20060406
7) Actions Speak Louder...
“Do you think those minions are what were causing all the problems? That the threat out here has been taken care of, and I should go back nicely with you?” Somsien is very calm and collected regardless of his current precarious situation, “When in truth, just a few blocks away, they’ve opened a new rift that could become a whole new gate. Yet instead of believing me, giving me the benefit of the doubt just once, you’re blinded by duty. You can’t take care of that rift if you’re walking me back to the Citadel. Even so, you can’t take care of it by yourselves. You were always blinded by what’s ‘right’.”
With unfathomable speed Somsien spins, deflecting Dahvid’s barrel to aim over his shoulder. He brings his pistol around and jams it under Dahvid’s chin- where, unlike my breast plate, it has a very real chance of being deadly.
“Now, do I have to threaten you two all night, or can we co-operate?” He says smugly, comfortable in his control of the situation.
I take the moment he is focused on Dahvid to rush him, but I can’t outmaneuver his sensors. Again, with incalculable alacrity, a swift kick is directed into my stomach. I feel the impact even through the armor over my abdomen and double over around his foot. Yet what he has in speed, I have in strength. Bent over in mock pain, I manage to get a good grip on his ankle. With a focused energy burst, I swing him helplessly through the air to collide with a nearby wall. The impact causes him to release his pistol and slump to the ground. Dahvid catches the wayward pistol out of the air, and points it and his rifle at Somsien.
“We’ll co-operate because I say so,” I walk over and pick him up off the ground by his chest plating, “And the only reason I can trust you now is because you just saved our asses. You broke my trust before… I can’t let you get away again. They almost suspended me for it last time. I won’t do that again, not even for a friend. We’ll deal with our little reunion later. My “duty” is to protect our outpost. Is that OK, or are you too worried about what’s best for you?”
Somsien dusts himself off out of habit and walks over to Dahvid to retrieve his gun.
“So I can’t shoot him then? …dumb.” Dahvid says, in jest. Somsien reaches for his pistol, but Dahvid spins it out of reach then spins it back to grip it by the barrel. His smirk can be felt.
Somsien snatches the pistol out of his hand and shoves him. I begin to laugh at the ridiculous situation and, eventually the other two join in.
“I hate you guys," Somsien mutters as he re-engages his active camouflage.

[Nezerv]

Awesome! :) realy nice, keep it up

[Half-Dragon]

This is kind of like journal entries, flashbacks that Xavier is having. It just seemed like a cool idea. Hope you guys like it.

20061404
8 )It's All in Your Head
We were making our rounds through the people who had arrived recently to the citadel.
"Hey, my name's Xavier. This is Dahvid," Dahvid gives the man a weak wave, "We're going around to talk to all the new arrivals to ask about any scientific or military background. Do you have any experience with-"
"No."
The man cuts me off before I can get any more of my sentence out.I can understand his hostility seeing as how in the last couple weeks and months the world has changed so severely.No one could really understand what was happening. We had been running for so long, now that they said they had some meager defenses to hold back the flow of the demons, it was hard to get acclimated.
"Well, what's your name? We're apparently going to be neighbors for a while."
The man seemed distant, like he was lost, and tired. But more than anything else...cold. Like death. He had curly hair and a thick beard as if shaving no longer mattered.
"A name? Ha! Hahahaha! What do names matter anymore? We're all dead, it's just a matter of time."
His laugh was devoid of humor. The hopelessness of his tone was almost staggering.
*******
We're the only ones who that man will talk to. He is extremely hostile to everyone else and he only seems to speak with us to keep from going insane. More insane, perhaps. He seems angry at everyone, as if this were somehow all of our fault. I don't know what about us makes him feel any better, but it's starting to make the two of us edgier. We've began snapping at each other over very miniscule things. He's a strange man.
*******
Everyone has been saying that he was hiding a gun since he had gotten here. We had tried to go around and collect them for testing, but some people said they had no weapons or just said they didn't want to give them up. This man seemed overly secretive and paranoid. He said he didn't have any weapons. He wouldn't eat the food with everyone else, either. Not that he didn't eat, he just would take anything that was given to him. He would end up with it later, eating the same rations that everyone else did. Just... I believe he stole it. Maybe it made him feel more in control of this whole situation. No one ever saw him do it though.
*******
He was going to kill himself. We had taken his gun- he was on a kind of suicide watch- but we had taken it from him. He got it back. I walked in on him trying to shoot himself in the head. I tackled him as he was pulling the trigger, and ended up getting myself shot in the bicep. He was allright. Some of the arcanist were able to fix me up, but there's still a scar. They get a lot of practice with the wounds that the demons cause, but they still are not perfect.
The guards didn't see him, and the gates didn't register him having entered or exited the gun cage. He hasn't told anyone what he used to do. Before this. I want to find out.
*******
He's been acting differently since our last... encounter. He seems less skittish and jumpy, like he feels better, has gotten over his issues. I saw his forearms today. I noticed jagged scars running from his wrist back to his elbow, but in a spiral like he had tried to slit his wrist perpendicular to his veins, but had kept going around in a spiral. He seemed ok with the fact that I noticed, but even more ok that I didn't mention anything about it. He and Dahvid have been seeming to get along also.
I managed to get him a razor, and he had shaved so he looked a little less like a bum. He looked more like a Zorro or Robin Hood. That's what I thought when I saw him. Like a scoundrel with an allright heart.
*******
He's been helping me build and design a new suit model. He seems to know something about circuit analysis. He still hasn't told me his name or what he used to do.
He still stole his food and other necessities. But never more than he needed. Why he didn't just ask I can't say. Some of the others have been saying he was special, destined by fate to be special. But he just couldn't stay out of trouble. For that I named him Somsien, a likeness of the Biblical character he reminded me of. The name has seemed to stick and he's comfortable with it.
*******
After everything I've gotten him out of, I can do nothing for him now. He took the suit. They said he was too unstable, that he couldn't be trusted. I argued that he had practically designed and built the thing. They didn't want to "lose resources". Even in a time like this, they were being politicians. I can do nothing but pray he doesn't die out there alone...

[Nezerv]

Nice journal, and a very good backstory about somisen :).

[HeadShot]

Havn't posted in awhile... The plot twist on the one before this was very good, and the journal is awesome. Explains the whole thing.

[Sol Invictus]

Very cool. I'll remember to post it up today. I've been busy with reworking some backend stuff lately.

[Waabulo]

Half-Dragon, good work. Nice story so far. I look forward to more installments. Keep up the good work.

[Eternalchaos]

Nice work Half-Dragon. Story is getting good . Keep that good stuff rollin ^_^

[Yangstuh]

sorry, I'm a late reader. Very good story!

[Half-Dragon]

Well everyone, I just want to say thank you. It's good to get feedback, cause sometimes I feel like interest is trailing off and I might as well not write them anymore. Plus, I like to hear what you do and -more importantly- do not like. I can keep the good stuff comin' and do my best to avoid the bad. I am very hard to offend, so even if you tell me you hate something and that it's stupid I'll try and make it better for everyone. I hope to have an update on thursday again, so be prepared.

It's really exciting to me too, because I make the story up as I go. I suppose it would be "better" and more coherent if I wrote it all out and it was all long, but then I'd never finish 'cause I'm a perfectionist.

So, in closing, thanks everybody again for your support. I hope you enjoy the next episode.

[Sol Invictus]

I'm very much looking forward to it. I'm sorry I haven't yet posted up the new chapter on the main site, but I in my defense, I haven't posted up northrop's updated FAQ, either. :P

I've just been really swamped with SupComHQ lately, but I'll get to it soon, I promise. Keep up the good work.

[Waabulo]

Hlaf-Dragon, we like your writing. Please do not give up on us. I think that interest may wax and wane, but you really should keep at it. Also, just wait until the posting of the newest installment, you'll peak more interest.

[Sol Invictus]

Alright. They're up on the main site. Now it's time to update the FAQ. ;)

http://www.hellgateguru.com/fanfiction.php
http://www.hellgateguru.com/fanfic-tbotb07.php
http://www.hellgateguru.com/fanfic-tbotb08.php

[Half-Dragon]

Bad news everybody... I died. Oh wait, that's not even mildly possible. Anyways, I had twelve hours of college today, the last 2 hours is calculas, mind you. So usually that's cool, I come home and work on the story. Then, my buddy reminds me I have to hand in a lab report for Materials Engineering. So, sorry kiddies, no update tonight. I'll do my best for tomorrow, but I don't want to make any promises.

[Sol Invictus]

Here's looking forward to the next chapter!

[Ademaro]

Great Job I like how the story is developing:)!!

[mr(JC)]

Im not much of a reader cause im lazy, but this story is actually really interesting, keep up the good work.

[Half-Dragon]

Well, I have to say sorry again guys. Cause, I mean, this chapter is pretty long. I know you hate that. Sorry for the lack of updates in forever. It's been nuts.
Big thanks to Sol for supplying some of the sound effects. I tried to format a little cause of the length, it didn't freakin work.

In the words of Strong Bad:
Os-we-go

20060502
9) Seeing Red Again

We had moved further down the street to the corner where the minions had come from.
"So, you do know where it is?" I ask Somsien, hoping he has some sort of plan for how we could approach this.
"Yeah, me and the demons have been chilling out around it, they had a block party the other day-"
"C'mon man!" I was becoming exasperated.
"Yes, I know where it is," Somsien answers, seeming almost offended I'm not in the mood for jokes. I still smile inside my helmet, "I'll download the layout onto your hard drives, there were a couple monsters all around last time I was there, but they change pretty regularly. We'll have to see about enemies when we get there."
"Well, if you know all of this, why don't you just walk in there and kill everything? I mean, you're the invisible man and all," Dahvid wonders aloud, unaware of the stealth suit's limited capability.
"Well, wouldn't that be great, I could just march in there and take care of all our problems. I could win this whole damn war on my own!"
I explain as to avoid further bantering and time wasting, "The suit charges up capacitors to actively bend light around his person, it can't be on constantly at full capacity, while he is moving at full speed. Even with the magic, it's pretty limited. He is just damn good at sneaking around."
Dahvid seems to accept a correction from me, and Somsien seems placated by my stepping in. I figure it's best to stop talking and just head out, so I signal Somsien to start moving. We all have our weapons at the ready again as we move down the street.
Somsien wields both of his automatic dueling pistols. They fire like submachine guns and are fairly accurate- while he’s aiming. There are those times he flails about and lets the computers do the work, like earlier. Not that it matters if he misses, seeing as how they shoot spectral rounds that don’t exactly originate from a bullet casing. They are specially enchanted to draw their munitions from an ethereal plane of negative energy. -We avoid reloading around here. Stuff like that gets people killed- He came up with the spells for that one.
His rapier is made from the shattered rib bone of a praetorian marauder demon- guards for larger demons. One of the more recent expeditions had come back with some pieces for analysis. It was exceedingly durable and caused other demons serious torment. Works for us…
I have my nodachi out, wishing for once I had longer range weapons. It isn’t often I want to be away from the fight, but I could only imagine what we were going to face at this rift. I made a mental note to keep watch for any discarded weapons that may be lying around or that may be inside of monsters. I had no problem extirpating some new toys, from some old “friends”.
Demons often had any number of things inside of them from having devoured some or all of those that had come before us. Not to mention they were often times wielding our own weapons against us.
Dahvid has his spark rifle out, once again preferring the accuracy, as he usually does. I was always glad he was on our side; otherwise I’d have a few more holes than I do now.
Turning every corner was nerve racking, even with Somsien scouting a bit ahead. The demons could always surprise us. They are just like that.
Somsien radioed from further ahead, “We should be getting some activity soon. Where is every-”
He was cut off as we suddenly heard inexplicable clicks and shrieks. Giant bug-like creatures were climbing down the walls around us. They are like spiders… only they had four legs. And where their eyes should have been are human skulls. Yet, most notable about these giant semi-arachnids is the giant plasma rifle protruding from their backs. Some grim experimentation had made these nightmarish foes even worse
I switch back to my tempest rifle, and line up a shot at the nearest one. The creature is facing toward Dahvid who is engaging several others. I pull the trigger… peewwww. My rifle made a sound like a generator powering down. Pew, pew, pew… Nothing. No power. I make a mental note to get my rifle fixed. That is just not a normal noise. I switched back to my sword and leap at the beast as it begins to fire its plasma weapon. I slice off a leg but it still nimbly turns and aims the blast at my chest instead. I roll to the side as the blast is emitted, slicing another leg with the momentum. The creature falls over with no way to keep its balance. I slice it in two as it lies helplessly on the ground.
The other two creatures are still engaging my friends, who are dodging while trying to return fire on the beasts. The zuzuzuz of the spark rifle, coupled with the constant sound of the submachine guns is almost drowned out by the heavy yet sharp roar of the fiend’s laser cannons. I dash toward the others, cutting and chopping as I go. The thick exoskeleton is durable, and does not give easily. I must have hit weak points on mine.
One creature kicks out, straight into my chest, and sends me tumbling back toward the one I had killed. I end up sprawled in its gooey remains. I had lost my sword in the fall, and as I push up out of the ichor, my hand rests on something angular, that did not feel like spider-goo. I pull it out of the slime to find it is a high caliber, semi-automatic pistol. I feel around to see if there is anything else, and find another matching weapon. However, this one is adorned with finger bones, which are meanwhile adorned with arm bones.
I say a quick prayer in my head for the fallen as I shake them off, and another that the guns are still functional. I pull the triggers alternatively, firing each one individually. To my delight, they fire… fire. The pistols apparently are enchanted with flame spells, yet as I approach the monsters, I notice holes appearing in their chitinous shells- so they still project solid ordinance.
Dahvid was doing a good job of keeping his distance and peppering the creature, not staying still at all and using cover.
The other creature was on top of Somsien, who was holding its slavering fangs away from his head. His pistol was out of reach on the ground, and his sword was extruding from its back. I kick the demon in its side for some attention, and as it turns to face me, I fire several rounds into its skull-face. The killing blows are landed by Dahvid who got done his and wanted seconds.
“You always pick the pretty ones, don’t you?” he says mockingly as I help Somsien up, “They always like you best.”
“Yeah, what the hell was that?” I ask, just waiting for the explanation.
“The sword thing worked for you… well at least at first. I figured I’d give it a try,” Somsien pulled his sword out as he talked, which was accompanied by a spurt of blue-green blood.
“Yeah, I’m the sword guy. That’s what I do. The sword thing. You don’t see me trying to sneak around, do you?” I chant a small spell that burns the ooze from my new found weapons. He doesn’t answer as he picks up his pistol.
“Those are nice,” comments Dahvid as I walk over to retrieve my sword.
“Yeah… I owe someone. Poor guy,” I put one pistol away as I shoulder my daikatana, “They should come in handy.”
“Yeah,” from Somsien.
“Yeah,” from Dahvid.
We all stand around for a moment in the awkward silence. Somsien starts laughing but we’re only a moment behind.
We all abruptly stop as a hazy figure begins to emerge from the temporal rift we hadn’t noticed was there until just then.
HAHAHAHAHA…

[HeadShot]

Very nice!

[Half-Dragon]

Wow, that sure is a lot of views... at least people look, if not stay to read it all. Thanks for the attention everybody.

[Nezerv]

Nice ! keep it up

[kIllEr_pOptArT]

Love the story Half-Dragon. Your character's presonalities are very consistent and creative, while still being flexible. A difficult thing for some to do when writing in first person especially. Keep it up :)

[Half-Dragon]

Hey Poptart (that seems derogatory somehow...),
Thanks for the specific, positive critique. It's awesome when people say I'm doing a good job. It's very awesome when they tell me what they like about the story.
Thanks again to all the fans of the story. Your support really helps to keep everything moving.

[kIllEr_pOptArT]

No problem, I read alot.... I mean alot. Like a book a week or more (school is easy for me so I've got plenty of time). Don't feel bad about calling me Poptart though, everyone I play with on CS:S calls me that so I'm used to it.

[Sol Invictus]

Excellent writing as always, Half Dragon. I await your next chapter. This latest one's going up on the main site ASAP!

OH yeah, I dig the Pew Pew Pew reference! HAHA!

edit: It's up! http://www.hellgateguru.com/fanfic-tbotb09.php

[Azurewrath]

Read it and loved it. Write more !
Don't shorten the chapters unless it's necessary for the overall quality.
I liked the characters, the militaristic view on Hellgate and the technical part (of the story). Keep it coming.

[Half-Dragon]

Wow-wow-wow. And that is not the first three notes of 'Smoke on the Water'...
I have so many awesome ideas for my story now, from the new HGL site. There's some surprises coming, you may love them or hate them, I just hope you guys are entertained.

[kIllEr_pOptArT]

I look forward to reading your next chapter, hopefully you'll include some of the mods and monsters shown in the new HG:L site.

[Half-Dragon]

If I promise to update tonight, then I feel like I have to and can't put it off. I promise you guys that I'll have the new chapter up tonight. It should be a good one...

[Azurewrath]

You can do it !
Give us something with a lot of technical stuff, a larger human outpost, maybe some descriptions of life within those walls and, afterwards, we want DEMON GUTS !!!!

[kIllEr_pOptArT]

yay new chapter... finally. i guess you have a tight schedule and writing does take a while... but to me it seems like a long time since the last section.

[Half-Dragon]

Well everyone, here we go. It’s somewhat of a cliff hanger, but I think you guys can figure out what’s up. 100th post and all, hope everyone likes it. Had exams this week, that sucked. I was going to do more, but it’s seems best to leave it where it is...

20060512
10) The End of the Beginning
The gate gives off in eerie light, nearly unobservable unless looking directly at it. It’s like a red mist- an ominous orange cloud at dawn, foreshadowing a storm. The hazy figure on the other side would need to stoop to exit the inter-dimensional portal, which stands at least 15ft. high at its peak. As far as we can tell, the more “the burn” has set in around a rift, the better grip it has in our world. However, the fastest way is for the area to be filled with death. The sudden release of life essence provides the fuel needed to anchor a gate firmly.

My faith leads me to believe that the souls of the departed continue on to their final place, be it heaven or hell. Or maybe it’s my sanity that tells me that- the other implications are too horrific to even imagine…

“Whatever that is, it's too large to exit with a gate this unstable,” Somsien says, “I've watched it for a few days. At first the smallest came through, then a little larger, but nothing anywhere near that size."
“Do you think that’s the gate guardian?” I ask Somsien, as he would have the best guess.
“I’d imagine so, he’s been standing around there for days. I believe the guardian needs to be there for the gate to allow passage.”
“So, what do we do now?” Dahvid asked, as perplexed as we are at the moment.
“Even if we went in and killed it, we wouldn’t be able to get out,” I propose, although none of us would care to enter that realm.
“It already knows we are here, apparently sound crosses the barrier,” Dahvid surmises, “I’d assume there’s going to be a welcoming party.”
“If we kill enough of them, the gate will be able to support that thing,” Somsien says out loud what each one of us is thinking.
“Is that really something we want to do, make this gate stronger? What if we don’t win?” I ask, trying to keep the station in mind.
“If we leave, they’ll just reinforce this area, and we’ll have an even harder time shutting this place down,” Dahvid gestures to the gate with his free hand as he is speaking.
“It seems, gentlemen, the time to decide has come to an end- they just decided for us,” as Somsien finishes speaking, several smaller humanoid figures emerge from the rift.

The creatures are roughly five feet tall- probably more, except they scuttle along with a hunched back. Their heads resemble an octopus, but facing backward on their shoulders. And where the back of the octopus’ head would be was a group of eight luminous eyes above a viscous maw filled with fangs. They move fairly quickly for their small bodies, which are covered in glowing scars. They’re called imps for short. Or maybe it’s gremlins. I get them mixed up due to their similarities…

As each phases through the gate, there’s a sound like sizzling flesh followed by a loud popping, like when you crush a sheet of bubble-wrap in your fist. As they emerge, we scatter from our semi-huddled formation to find better tactical positions.

They come out firing and we feel obliged to do the same. They use demonic weapons as well as human, and for a few moments the sound of gunfire is all around. We realize, as do the demons, that our immediate death would be the best possible scenario. They could open the gate on their own time with three less hurdles in the way.

However, the instance we are all counting on is that we will kill enough of them that the gate can support larger and larger demons. They have the advantage, we just need to hope that they send out the gate keeper before we are dead. If we could just shut this gate, we would set them back months of casting and preparing rituals. But by killing them right here, we are accelerating their progress. That’s why we need to kill the gate guardian as soon as possible.

Wielding my nodachi and a single pistol, the things are dropping left and right. I shoot in small bursts and aim for the head, slashing wildly around so as to at least maim any I don’t kill. These seem to truly be cannon fodder, as their weapons just barely register hits on my armor.

Dahvid is dropping them at an impressive rate, with his weapon on full auto. zzzzzzztt zzzzzzzzt zzzzzt It is as one solid stream, once again almost a laser beam of lightning. He likes to fire over my shoulders and past my sides when he’s showing off. He says he has his targeting computers on, but the last time I updated the drivers on his helmet was months ago.

Even Somsien’s weapons seem ultra effective, tearing apart legs, torsos, and faces while he dances about, finishing them off with a swift kick to tear them open at the middle- or a jab in the brain to stop them cold. Their death-cry is a mix of a gurgle and the scream of a pig being slaughtered.

This wave of demons is nearly finished, but I can easily see more figures charging through the rift. The color of the gate is much more pronounced, and the creatures coming through are much clearer just before they emerge.

The difference in the first and second wave of creatures is quickly apparent. The ape-like creatures rushing toward us are known as fetid hulks. They use their massive arms as legs until they are in range to batter you to death. They also glow dimly, with a sickly green color pulsating on their surface. Though not very intelligent, their brute strength and surprising agility make them incredibly perilous. Not to mention their acid breath. There are four of the beasts, and to make matters worse, there are several zombies that seem to have wandered out of the portal with them.

Zombies, while not very dangerous, make me sick to my stomach. The thought that those had been people, possibly my friends, makes me incredibly disgusted- and maniacally enraged. I holster my pistol and get a good grip on my daikatana. As one of the fetid hulks charges me, I prime my boot thrusters. Right as the beast is almost upon me, I leap into the air and land on its back.

While in the air, I see that Dahvid has switched to his cluster rifle. Rockets are flying all around the battlefield, and the explosions are confusing the hell out of those hulks, and tearing up the zombies. Somsien is nowhere to be seen, but the gunfire from his twin spike bolter dueling pistols appears all around the field, further disorienting the monsters.
As I land on the creature, it slams haphazardly into the wall I stood in front of. I bury my blade into its spinal column mid-impact, and the force of its own weight paralyzes the beast where it lies. I leave it to suffer, and sprint back into the fray.

I fell zombies with one swing, like grass before the scythe. They are abominations, that have no place in any world. The fetid hulks are nearby, being bombarded with explosives. Confident in that fact, I get an overgrown fist in my back.

Two of the hulks are down, but one of the others has gotten a heavy shot on me. I roll and try to recover but get swarmed by zombies as I stand up. Not able to get it readied in time, I drop my sword and begin to punch them to try and clear some space. Dahvid comes to my aid, firing rockets at close range. I notice the third hulk down with Somsien’s rapier sticking out of its throat.

Some zombies crawl around with their bottom halves missing. The field is clear except for the last hulk which is nearly on top of Somsien. He only has one pistol and he doesn’t have a chance to kill the thing before it breathes its acidic breath all over him. He rolls and avoids the worst of it, but the liquid quickly begins to burn through his armor.
Dahvid beats me to the beast as I retrieve my sword, focusing his spark rifle fire (having switched back to it) on one of its hind legs, making it stumble. He jumps into the air and drop kicks it, making it fall over. As he lies prone, I liberate the thing’s head from its body, executioner style.

Somsien is meanwhile pulling off pieces of his armor. The creature’s breath weapon is highly corrosive, eating almost immediately through any material, even enchanted diamond.

“You all right?” I ask him, fully aware we should be expecting another fight soon enough.
“Yeah, it burnt out a lot of my computers, though. I don’t think I can wear the helmet,” he answers, “Cloaking is offline, too.”
His face is drenched in sweat, and he is missing much of the armor from his upper half, be it from him removing it, or it was just burnt through. Scars cover his body, self-inflicted on his arms, others streaming blood from our battles with these things. It brings to mind our humanity, when I so often believe us to be invincible.
“Can you hold out?” I ask him, seriously worried.
“I can still shoot,” he says painfully as he recovers his weapons.
Dahvid meanwhile picks himself up off the ground and finishes off the zombies in the area, in preparation for whatever came next.

Just then we realize that the gate is, what appears to be, fully operational. The gate keeper is emerging with no resistance. The creature is at least 18 feet tall, with massive bony spikes all over its back. It doesn’t appear to have eyes, but I can feel its hateful glare. It is humanoid in appearance, but arms and legs is where the resemblance stops. One of its arms is small and shriveled, while the other is massive. It appears to have been grafted on, a mixture of flesh and metal.

The beast lumbers toward us, dragging its gigantic arm on the ground. I have no doubt it could crush me with one blow. Dahvid immediately begins to pepper the thing with rockets, while I pull out both pistols and open-up on it. Somsien likewise riddles it with small-arms fire.

At first the creature doesn’t seem to know what to do. It is confused for but a second, as it swings its massive arm down to pulverize Dahvid. He dodges just in time, but chunks of stone from the shattered street fly up and knock him once more to the ground. I rush to distract the thing, shooting its hind quarters as I advance. It spins with unbelievable speed and snatches me in its massive claw. I continue to fire as it crushes the breath out of me, hoping my friends can finish it off. It holds me up to its face and roars its triumph at my demise. I begin to black out as it crushes my lungs.

Yet Dahvid, on his back, fires several rockets directly into its open mouth causing it to choke and drop me to the ground. Meanwhile, Somsien makes his way toward me, with a constant stream of gunfire. The beast seems to cough and pause for a second, and then spins and crushes the building standing behind Dahvid. The avalanche of rubble topples down onto him, silencing his rocket launcher.

I lie on the ground, fading in and out of consciousness, hoping the thing believes me to be dead. But it is apparent it does not, as it opens its mouth again. Not to roar this time, but in an attempt to swallow me alive.

I pray to God with my last second of consciousness that it won’t last long. As I pass out for good, I see what appears to be several large explosions- and then darkness.

[Azurewrath]

Very, very good. Nice cliffhanger.
Get to work on the next chapter, slave !!!!! I demand entertainment and a good read. Also, if they wake up in a hospital wing or something like that, give us a description of the outpost and how many people it has etc.

[Half-Dragon]

But if I give a description and numbers of people and whatever the hell else, and then it doesn't coincide with the game... I just feel dirty.

No, that's kinda what I planned on, but the plans I have now are very subject to change.
Hope you guys liked this chapter... it'll be hard to top this nonsense.

[kIllEr_pOptArT]

I like this chapter, and plenty of action. I like how you showed some of Somien's abilities and weaknesses, and ending it with the main character feeling helpless. A good cliffhanger to be sure.

[Azurewrath]

If adding too much info sort of cheapens it for you, then don't. But you could hint at it or you could do it, the game is a long way away and the fanfic is suppose to create interest.
Besides, would humanity really survive with 10 people outposts, and I have the feeling that's the number of npc's we'll be seeing in safe areas. At least I hope not.
If it makes you feel better, you set the story's trend in the beginning, when you gave the outpost a militaristic feel, with an airlock and te rations and the fact that they had specialised teams to build suits, not to mention recon ans scavenging squads for the downed fighters.
Sooooo .... shall we say 1000 people ? Capable of communicating with other outposts via radio, through the remaining satellites, whatever.

[Half-Dragon]

I'm sure I'll explain at least a little about the outpost, I'd imagine we'll be hanging around it for a while. In the story...

[Killmojo]

Excellent read I must say. I especailly liked the most recent chapter. What will happen to our beloved heroes?

[Azurewrath]

Well, Killmojo, would you give blurt out the whole next chapter of a story and ruin the suspense ? I know that was a rhetorical question.

I'm sure I'll explain at least a little about the outpost, I'd imagine we'll be hanging around it for a while. In the story...

Well, I didn't want to pressure you or seem too fanboyish, and after reading through the story and the posts again I realise I was kind of a nag, but it's very interesting and it always comes as a surprise to me what other people can think of or what they can create with their imagination. By asking you about the outpost, I was trying to probe through the world of your characters and maybe paint a clearer, more accurate picture of what the HG universe should be like, just like a fan reads every preview of a book he awaits.
But I promise I'll be good and contend with waiting for the next update.

[Half-Dragon]

I don't mind, I like to see that someone is really into it. Even if I said, "We are going to be in the base" I don't think that gives it away.

Stories aren't just about what happens, they're about how what happened... happened.
Like sports: It's not just about the score, but about how the game was played.

[Azurewrath]

My sentiments exactly ! Great minds truly think alike ! :D:D:D:D:D

[kIllEr_pOptArT]

Azurewrath's great mind truly deserves all 5 of those smilies.

[Half-Dragon]

Hahahaha

[Azurewrath]

Hahahaha, very funny, kIllEr pOptArT.
If you didn't get it, it was just a joke, I'm not a vain person.

PS I'm glad you agree

[SgtPepper]

Your so vain... You probally think this song is about you! don't you? baby.

[Azurewrath]

:D :evil: :twisted: :wink:

You have me all figured out.

[Draklar]

This story delivers. Keep it comin.

P.S.- yes this is who u think it is.;)

[Shayera]

Cool story - too bad that we can't download it somehow... But carry on, i really appreciate your work :)

[Half-Dragon]

P.S.- yes this is who u think it is.;)
Smilies my good friend? Smilies? Be thou out of your mind?

Edit: I have nothing against smilies.

Anyways, I promise to everyone that I'll have the next chapter up by -at the latest- thursday night (friday morning). When I promise, I feel like I have to. I've just been so busy...

[Blackfish]

Hey Half-Dragon, I only read this about a day ago, but I wanted to tell you how much I'm enjoying it! The technical descriptions are really nice and very creative, great job!

I also really want to know what happens:shock:

Keep it up, this is great stuff; the characters are nifty and pretty well-rounded, and the action is well done.

[SgtPepper]

Can anyone summarize for me what has happened thus far? I honestly cannot see myself reading the entire beginning.

I mean 10 pages... its just so much!

[Half-Dragon]

Can anyone summarize for me what has happened thus far?
Oh, come on! That's just silly. Why not read it whenever you get a chance? It's not even 10 full pages. But hey-maybe I'll write "spark notes" for you lazy folk (no offense!). Just let me get the next chapter out by tomorrow, and I'll see what I can do.

[FlappyFace]

HLEH!!! I can't wait till you write more because I know that I wish it was 10 pages. You know, without all the posts and everything that you don't have to read. You better write a tons-a-bunch more!!

[Half-Dragon]

^Frightening, but reminscient of Creeper in TES: Morrowind. Which is... creepy.

Also remember, you can read it straight through in the Fan Fiction (http://www.hellgateguru.com/fanfiction.php) archive... if you wanna do that. I mean, Sol loves spending all his time organizing, so it's not like he did it for us.

[Draklar]

come on, that is truly lazy. I dont like to read either, but come on... come on.:mrgreen: and yes smilies are FTW.

cant wait for the next installment. HURRY!

[Half-Dragon]

This took me forever, sorry for the wait. Hope you guys like it. It will be obvious I took a freedom with some things. That means I made it up.

20060526
11)Darkest Darkness
I heard beeping… I wished someone would shut it off. I hate beeping in the morning when I’m trying to sleep.
Someone walked into the room lightly, as if not to wake me. I stifled a smile and continued breathing evenly to appear still asleep, in hopes of receiving a backrub. She always did that to wake me up.
“You said we were going to the park. It’s almost noon,” she shut off the alarm and began to rub my back exposed above the covers. She did always know I was awake.
“It’s not just a park,” I mumbled into the pillow, knowing she didn’t really care. I figured I’d wait until she stopped before getting up to get dressed.
**********
“I know its not really chips!” she said as we passed several shops as we walked down to the train station, “I just don’t like fish that much.”
We stopped outside a shop that had every imaginable curiosity on display. She kissed me again as we stood there, and it went on like that for a while until someone came out of the shop with a gasp. We just laughed as we stepped out of the way, “I love you, you know.” She smiled her beautiful smile and replied in kind.
**********
“Hey, Theo said he wanted a souvenir. I was going to get him something nice. Any of your friends want anything?” I asked her as I walked into the shop.
“No, they all wanted things from Hawaii, so I already got everyone something,” she walked around the shop looking at things here and there, not all that interested. There was a stand full of cricket bats near the counter. I picked-up one to test its weight. Knowing my friend was a sports buff, he’d probably like it. I bought it and a backpack- in case there was anything else I found on our way that I wouldn’t want to hold in my hands.
**********
The trains were more colorful than I was used to from home, but the ride was enjoyable. The tunnels were narrow and sturdy, a bottleneck of sorts. We took a train out of Waterloo station to Salisbury, then a short bus ride out to the site. I had always wanted to visit Stonehenge. The mystery and magic of the place was appealing to me, and I thought it would be nice as a day trip. She actually seemed to be looking forward to something I wanted to do for once. She did enjoy the fresh air.
**********
“You know these stones can’t be found anywhere around here for miles?” I asked her, already knowing she didn’t- and that she probably didn’t care.
“Oh?” she said, half interested, “A storm’s coming in.”
There was a mass of dark clouds rolling quickly toward us from the city. I hadn’t expected rain.
I had a friend who knew a guy and we were actually able to get inside the ring of stones. It was a broken ring, but amazing none-the-less. They were actually doing an excavation of sorts, based on some archeologist’s findings. I lightly touched the stones with lintels still intact, as if my light touch could disturb these that had stood for centuries.
My friend’s-friend that had gotten us in came back from talking with the archeologists to try and fill us in on what they were doing.
“In recent years, they have found evidence that leads them to believe that there was a structure built around the stones here at Stonehenge. No remains have ever been found on the surface, but they think that underneath the ground there may be some support for the claim. Echo-electrical technology was implemented, but they couldn’t read very deep before the readings were obscured. They are digging to look for a floor of some sort. We are truly lucky to be here if the find anything. This day will go down in history!” my friend seemed excited, like today would be his defining moment. I was hopeful for his sake.
“What’s echo-electric technology?” she asked me quietly.
“They focus electricity through sound waves. It’s relatively new technology that they won’t use in the States. They say it is potentially harmful,” I explained. I knew a lot about it, as the government had me assess the technology for use in military applications. I had to finish my report on the HARP project as soon as we got back from our honeymoon.
The man we were with also showed us a sample of the bluestone the inner “horseshoe” was made of. He explained that it was anomalous in that it appeared dark blue when it was wet or freshly broken, but it eventually faded.
Just then the archeologists struck something and they let out a yell. The bustle was amazing as they cleared masses of dirt with mechanized shovelers. They were infinitesimally accurate, so there was no fear of harming the structures.
A floor-like mass of stone could be observed where the outer-most stones once stood. It was unbelievably smooth and level, to the point that it was hard to believe it was anything other than man-made.
The edges were the one thing that stood out to me. They were unevenly, perhaps unnaturally, rounded.
“Why would everything be so angular and straight and that be so… not?” I asked out loud, as everyone stood astounded at the find.
“It looks melted,” said the fellow we were with, yet no one heard him. They began to celebrate the find as that of the century and to cheer for themselves. We went along with it, but I was troubled. I knew there was no volcanic activity here, seeing as that was the only plausible way to melt several feet of sandstone to that extent.
“What on earth could do that?” I asked, just as the storm reached us. I expected a torrent of cool rain, but instead was met with a wall of hot air and the sun being blotted out behind the clouds. We heard screams further off down the path toward the welcoming center, but barely over the excited bustle of workers and archeologists.
Just then I saw a large dog crest the hill from the direction of the center, and assumed that it had frightened some people. Then I saw several more following close behind. Wild dogs would avoid a place with this many people, but that was the only explanation. The animals rushed toward our group on all fours. I alerted the men standing around who quickly prepared for the implausible siege. The shovelers rolled out on their treads like mech-warriors, wielding sonically charged axes and shovels. They felled a few of the things while the rest headed for the group of us.
What had just been a party was now a battle ground with people being pounced on and having their throats ripped out or hamstrings severed. Everyone began to fight back as they closed in on us.
I realized now they weren’t dogs, but more like huge komodo dragons with spikes. And they were agile like cougars. I couldn’t believe my eyes, but regardless I did my best to shield my new wife with my body. I wielded the cricket bat like a club, swatting at any that came too close. Some of the security guards from around the site wielded handguns or electrified batons. The handguns seemed to throw the things off balance but do little damage. The batons at least seemed to be truly hurting them.
I moved to one of the arches and helped her climb on top of it. I stayed on the ground to continue to help others around me. A shoveler was thrown back on top of one of the fallen stones, which shattered under its weight. As I watched the man inside get pulled from the wreck by his arm and promptly killed, I was tackled by a creature. I landed near the crushed stone and fended its snapping jaws off with the bat it had pinned between us. I searched with my other hand for something to injure it with and found a piece of sharp stone lying on the ground. I rammed this into the thing’s head with ease, killing it quickly.
I snatched a longer stone spike from the ground and began killing the things in the surrounding area. I remembered my wife and ran back to the stone she was on top of, where she lay with her eyes closed and tears streaming down her face. I stood in the center of the arch and observed the carnage around the area. These things were dragging people off, back in the other direction away from the standing stones. Some others were pacing in a semi-circle of the place I was standing, as if some barrier stopped them from coming any closer. The only explanation I could imagine was some inherent magic in the stones stopped them from attacking me.
The man we were here with lay dead on the ground with his throat ripped out. I said a prayer in my head and hoped they would leave me be for now. I helped my wife down so we could wait until they were gone. I gathered any shards I could, and put them in my backpack.
**********
We could only move small distances at a time. The streets were crawling with demons. She was waiting for me in a small hideout that I hoped would be safe while I ran down to the market to loot it for any food that may be left. There were others around, but it was best to stay in small groups. I scrounged for what I could and hurried back to where I had left her.
**********
I lay there in a pool of blood, my own mingled with theirs. All of the stone slivers I had salvaged were embedded in their skulls and through their spines pinning them to the ground. I had come back to find our makeshift home filled with demons and no sign of my wife. Had they killed her? I wasn’t sure. The lack of a body led me to believe they had taken her for some wicked purpose. I had killed them all and now waited for my own deserved death for having failed to protect the only thing that mattered.
**********
Beep. Beep. Beep. I hate the beeping.
“Xander! Xander! Wake up!”
The voice brings me back to reality, if you can call it that. I am face to face with Somsien who had been shaking me by the shoulders. This is the second time I’ve awoke in a hospital bed here. The heart monitor is beeping wildly.
“What? What?” I say impatiently.
“You haven’t been conscious for days, and you already have an attitude. Man… You were screaming your head off from a nightmare; I was trying to help you out.” Somsien says, sitting back down in his chair, shirtless. The scars on his arms were readily apparent in the bright light of the hospital wing.
The memory of what had happened flooded back into my mind, “How did we- What- Is Dahvid okay?” The questions came too quickly to process them.
“He’s fine. He helped carry you back here. You’re a heavy kinda guy with all that armor.”
Dahvid walked in with some food on a dish, “I hope you like mushrooms!”
The meals consisted heavily of mushrooms and other easy to grow vegetables. We had no meat except from the rare can, seeing as how we ate any animals almost immediately.
“What the hell happened?” I ask trying to piece things together.
“First things first… You know that time you stopped me from killing myself?” Somsien asked tentatively, like he wasn’t comfortable talking about it.
“Yeah, I remember. What’s that-” he cuts me off.
“I’ve killed myself before. Not tried. Did. I can’t remember the details perfectly, the shrink says they’re repressed. I remember a drug overdose on acid, and a hunting knife. That’s where these scars came from,” he held up his arms like they weren’t obvious, “I remember the feeling of death, and the suffering in that place. I had just a taste of hell, but somehow they brought me back. They saved me in the hospital somehow. Something like the drugs stopped my heart, so I didn’t bleed to death like I should have.”
Dahvid seemed uncomfortable, like he had heard this all already. He wasn’t one to believe things he couldn’t see, but he changed a lot after the demon invasion.
“I think I was imbued with some… power. Some incarnate evil that was warped inside of me. When the demons arrived I lost my mind. I can’t remember where I went, what I did. When you saved my life that day, I was different. The voices stopped. But the other day on the battle field, when I was covered in acid, with the mixed scent of flesh and metal and crystal burning, the voices came back. But they spoke with one voice. My voice. The raw energy I released killed that demon, since it was nearly dead anyway.”
He seemed so fervent; I could see an almost maniacal light in his eyes. I was nearly worried until it subsided.
“I know it’s a lot to take in. Just know that I’ve discovered a new power within myself. This… flow of magic, which I am just starting to figure out. When we are all rested, they said we should go back out, and try and find any others. I just wanted to tell you, but I am late for a training session.”
He patted me on the shoulder, then got up and left the room. I think he scared himself a little and that’s why he left so abruptly.
“Why isn’t he in a cell somewhere? Shouldn’t they have locked him up for everything he did?” I ask Dahvid who seems as confused about his rant as I.
“I explained to them what happened. They agreed to judge him not guilty after hearing your report,” he ate some of my mushrooms as we both sit and think.
I could only marvel at the whole situation. Suddenly my dreams from earlier rushed back and I grabbed Dahvid’s arm.
“We have to go to Stonehenge!”

[Half-Dragon]

This took me forever, sorry for the wait. Hope you guys like it. It will be obvious I took a freedom with some things. That means I made it up.

20060526
11)Darkest Darkness
I heard beeping… I wished someone would shut it off. I hate beeping in the morning when I’m trying to sleep.
Someone walked into the room lightly, as if not to wake me. I stifled a smile and continued breathing evenly to appear still asleep, in hopes of receiving a backrub. She always did that to wake me up.
“You said we were going to the park. It’s almost noon,” she shut off the alarm and began to rub my back exposed above the covers. She did always know I was awake.
“It’s not just a park,” I mumbled into the pillow, knowing she didn’t really care. I figured I’d wait until she stopped before getting up to get dressed.
**********
“I know its not really chips!” she said as we passed several shops as we walked down to the train station, “I just don’t like fish that much.”
We stopped outside a shop that had every imaginable curiosity on display. She kissed me again as we stood there, and it went on like that for a while until someone came out of the shop with a gasp. We just laughed as we stepped out of the way, “I love you, you know.” She smiled her beautiful smile and replied in kind.
**********
“Hey, Theo said he wanted a souvenir. I was going to get him something nice. Any of your friends want anything?” I asked her as I walked into the shop.
“No, they all wanted things from Hawaii, so I already got everyone something,” she walked around the shop looking at things here and there, not all that interested. There was a stand full of cricket bats near the counter. I picked-up one to test its weight. Knowing my friend was a sports buff, he’d probably like it. I bought it and a backpack- in case there was anything else I found on our way that I wouldn’t want to hold in my hands.
**********
The trains were more colorful than I was used to from home, but the ride was enjoyable. The tunnels were narrow and sturdy, a bottleneck of sorts. We took a train out of Waterloo station to Salisbury, then a short bus ride out to the site. I had always wanted to visit Stonehenge. The mystery and magic of the place was appealing to me, and I thought it would be nice as a day trip. She actually seemed to be looking forward to something I wanted to do for once. She did enjoy the fresh air.
**********
“You know these stones can’t be found anywhere around here for miles?” I asked her, already knowing she didn’t- and that she probably didn’t care.
“Oh?” she said, half interested, “A storm’s coming in.”
There was a mass of dark clouds rolling quickly toward us from the city. I hadn’t expected rain.
I had a friend who knew a guy and we were actually able to get inside the ring of stones. It was a broken ring, but amazing none-the-less. They were actually doing an excavation of sorts, based on some archeologist’s findings. I lightly touched the stones with lintels still intact, as if my light touch could disturb these that had stood for centuries.
My friend’s-friend that had gotten us in came back from talking with the archeologists to try and fill us in on what they were doing.
“In recent years, they have found evidence that leads them to believe that there was a structure built around the stones here at Stonehenge. No remains have ever been found on the surface, but they think that underneath the ground there may be some support for the claim. Echo-electrical technology was implemented, but they couldn’t read very deep before the readings were obscured. They are digging to look for a floor of some sort. We are truly lucky to be here if the find anything. This day will go down in history!” my friend seemed excited, like today would be his defining moment. I was hopeful for his sake.
“What’s echo-electric technology?” she asked me quietly.
“They focus electricity through sound waves. It’s relatively new technology that they won’t use in the States. They say it is potentially harmful,” I explained. I knew a lot about it, as the government had me assess the technology for use in military applications. I had to finish my report on the HARP project as soon as we got back from our honeymoon.
The man we were with also showed us a sample of the bluestone the inner “horseshoe” was made of. He explained that it was anomalous in that it appeared dark blue when it was wet or freshly broken, but it eventually faded.
Just then the archeologists struck something and they let out a yell. The bustle was amazing as they cleared masses of dirt with mechanized shovelers. They were infinitesimally accurate, so there was no fear of harming the structures.
A floor-like mass of stone could be observed where the outer-most stones once stood. It was unbelievably smooth and level, to the point that it was hard to believe it was anything other than man-made.
The edges were the one thing that stood out to me. They were unevenly, perhaps unnaturally, rounded.
“Why would everything be so angular and straight and that be so… not?” I asked out loud, as everyone stood astounded at the find.
“It looks melted,” said the fellow we were with, yet no one heard him. They began to celebrate the find as that of the century and to cheer for themselves. We went along with it, but I was troubled. I knew there was no volcanic activity here, seeing as that was the only plausible way to melt several feet of sandstone to that extent.
“What on earth could do that?” I asked, just as the storm reached us. I expected a torrent of cool rain, but instead was met with a wall of hot air and the sun being blotted out behind the clouds. We heard screams further off down the path toward the welcoming center, but barely over the excited bustle of workers and archeologists.
Just then I saw a large dog crest the hill from the direction of the center, and assumed that it had frightened some people. Then I saw several more following close behind. Wild dogs would avoid a place with this many people, but that was the only explanation. The animals rushed toward our group on all fours. I alerted the men standing around who quickly prepared for the implausible siege. The shovelers rolled out on their treads like mech-warriors, wielding sonically charged axes and shovels. They felled a few of the things while the rest headed for the group of us.
What had just been a party was now a battle ground with people being pounced on and having their throats ripped out or hamstrings severed. Everyone began to fight back as they closed in on us.
I realized now they weren’t dogs, but more like huge komodo dragons with spikes. And they were agile like cougars. I couldn’t believe my eyes, but regardless I did my best to shield my new wife with my body. I wielded the cricket bat like a club, swatting at any that came too close. Some of the security guards from around the site wielded handguns or electrified batons. The handguns seemed to throw the things off balance but do little damage. The batons at least seemed to be truly hurting them.
I moved to one of the arches and helped her climb on top of it. I stayed on the ground to continue to help others around me. A shoveler was thrown back on top of one of the fallen stones, which shattered under its weight. As I watched the man inside get pulled from the wreck by his arm and promptly killed, I was tackled by a creature. I landed near the crushed stone and fended its snapping jaws off with the bat it had pinned between us. I searched with my other hand for something to injure it with and found a piece of sharp stone lying on the ground. I rammed this into the thing’s head with ease, killing it quickly.
I snatched a longer stone spike from the ground and began killing the things in the surrounding area. I remembered my wife and ran back to the stone she was on top of, where she lay with her eyes closed and tears streaming down her face. I stood in the center of the arch and observed the carnage around the area. These things were dragging people off, back in the other direction away from the standing stones. Some others were pacing in a semi-circle of the place I was standing, as if some barrier stopped them from coming any closer. The only explanation I could imagine was some inherent magic in the stones stopped them from attacking me.
The man we were here with lay dead on the ground with his throat ripped out. I said a prayer in my head and hoped they would leave me be for now. I helped my wife down so we could wait until they were gone. I gathered any shards I could, and put them in my backpack.
**********
We could only move small distances at a time. The streets were crawling with demons. She was waiting for me in a small hideout that I hoped would be safe while I ran down to the market to loot it for any food that may be left. There were others around, but it was best to stay in small groups. I scrounged for what I could and hurried back to where I had left her.
**********
I lay there in a pool of blood, my own mingled with theirs. All of the stone slivers I had salvaged were embedded in their skulls and through their spines pinning them to the ground. I had come back to find our makeshift home filled with demons and no sign of my wife. Had they killed her? I wasn’t sure. The lack of a body led me to believe they had taken her for some wicked purpose. I had killed them all and now waited for my own deserved death for having failed to protect the only thing that mattered.
**********
Beep. Beep. Beep. I hate the beeping.
“Xander! Xander! Wake up!”
The voice brings me back to reality, if you can call it that. I am face to face with Somsien who had been shaking me by the shoulders. This is the second time I’ve awoke in a hospital bed here. The heart monitor is beeping wildly.
“What? What?” I say impatiently.
“You haven’t been conscious for days, and you already have an attitude. Man… You were screaming your head off from a nightmare; I was trying to help you out.” Somsien says, sitting back down in his chair, shirtless. The scars on his arms were readily apparent in the bright light of the hospital wing.
The memory of what had happened flooded back into my mind, “How did we- What- Is Dahvid okay?” The questions came too quickly to process them.
“He’s fine. He helped carry you back here. You’re a heavy kinda guy with all that armor.”
Dahvid walked in with some food on a dish, “I hope you like mushrooms!”
The meals consisted heavily of mushrooms and other easy to grow vegetables. We had no meat except from the rare can, seeing as how we ate any animals almost immediately.
“What the hell happened?” I ask trying to piece things together.
“First things first… You know that time you stopped me from killing myself?” Somsien asked tentatively, like he wasn’t comfortable talking about it.
“Yeah, I remember. What’s that-” he cuts me off.
“I’ve killed myself before. Not tried. Did. I can’t remember the details perfectly, the shrink says they’re repressed. I remember a drug overdose on acid, and a hunting knife. That’s where these scars came from,” he held up his arms like they weren’t obvious, “I remember the feeling of death, and the suffering in that place. I had just a taste of hell, but somehow they brought me back. They saved me in the hospital somehow. Something like the drugs stopped my heart, so I didn’t bleed to death like I should have.”
Dahvid seemed uncomfortable, like he had heard this all already. He wasn’t one to believe things he couldn’t see, but he changed a lot after the demon invasion.
“I think I was imbued with some… power. Some incarnate evil that was warped inside of me. When the demons arrived I lost my mind. I can’t remember where I went, what I did. When you saved my life that day, I was different. The voices stopped. But the other day on the battle field, when I was covered in acid, with the mixed scent of flesh and metal burning, the voices came back. But they spoke with one voice. My voice. The raw energy I released killed that demon, since it was nearly dead anyway.”
He seemed so fervent; I could see an almost maniacal light in his eyes. I was nearly worried until it subsided.
“I know it’s a lot to take in. Just know that I’ve discovered a new power within myself. This… flow of magic, which I am just starting to figure out. When we are all rested, they said we should go back out, and try and find any others. I just wanted to tell you, but I am late for a training session.”
He patted me on the shoulder, then got up and left the room. I think he scared himself a little and that’s why he left so abruptly.
“Why isn’t he in a cell somewhere? Shouldn’t they have locked him up for everything he did?” I ask Dahvid who seems as confused about his rant as I.
“I explained to them what happened. They agreed to judge him not guilty after hearing your report,” he ate some of my mushrooms as we both sit and think.
I could only marvel at the whole situation. Suddenly my dreams from earlier rushed back and I grabbed Dahvid’s arm.
“We have to go to Stonehenge!”

[FlappyFace]

AAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSOOOOOOMMMMMMMEE EEEEESSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!

[Blackfish]

Very, very nice! Quite well-written, and the character development is great! Well done.

If you really want picky criticism, I'd say that the transition from from the celebration at Stonehenge to the fight there was a bit choppy; the flow was interrupted and while it was abrubt (which I imagine is how the fight started!) it didn't really convey that so much as start the battle off kind of awkwardly.

Anyway, understand that this is me being REALLY picky since you asked for comments and critiques. It's a small part of a really great post, and I really liked how you worked in the HARP technology very creatively rather than hokey, like it could be. Very, very well done!

[Azurewrath]

Really nice. I like where this is going. The initial assault of the demons was really cool but a bit ... under what I had expected. Columns of fire, screaming, a sense of angst, but it's your vision.

Reading this, I got the impression that Somsien is actually the first confirmed cabalist and now they want to find more and maybe some magical power source that could, in theory, shield large settlements as it had done with Stonehenge.

Can't wait to see what you come up with next. I hope there won't be any flashbacks in the next chapters, except for how Xander got to the base and stuff.

Here's a cool thing. Xander's wife went missing during the beginning of the war, Spoof's heroes heard a person being sacrificed at night and found the body all hacked up. Maybe the demons moved the wife to a more unholy site to benefit most from the ritual !

[FlappyFace]

Oh man!!! This story is getting better and better with each chapter and the first time we saw the demons in your story was so awesome. I love how you didn't even start with the gates opening, that this was actually BEFORE the gates opened. (Thats the impression i got.) It seems these were the Harbingers from the first paragraph in the first chapter.

And all the flashbacks so far have been amazing, I love to know more and more about the characters, ESPECIALLY Somsien, he's my favorite.;) But i also can't wait to hear more about Xander and maybe even a little about Dahvid, even though he sounds like a bum.

And Azurewrath the thing about Xander's wife was quick thinking but HIGHLY unlikely, and I'll tell you why. In something that Half-Dragon posted he said that he just goes week by week when writing his story, that he doesn't know where it's going to go next. So what I believe (something that isn't dumb) is that maybe he doesn't know what really happened to his wife, so perhaps you should let him write his story.

Great job so far Half-Dragon, I look forward to the next post. Hopefully there will be one this week. :p

[Azurewrath]

FlappyFace, I waqs just doing a bit of guess work. Of course I'm wrong ! But it would've been a nice coincidence if it were real. For all we know, Xander could be delusional and has never had a wife, or he imagined the incident after the invasion to justify some things to himself.

Half-Dragon, keep up the good work ! I can't wait for my next helping of Xander-Dahvid-Somsien stew.

[Half-Dragon]

It seems these were the Harbingers from the first paragraph in the first chapter.

They were indeed Harbingers. I guess I didn't make it clear that this was the case. I kinda jumped from Pre-Gate to Post-Gate.

I'd say that the transition from from the celebration at Stonehenge to the fight there was a bit choppy;
You are absolutely correct. But I thought of a great excuse. Since these were nightmares, it was choppy. Yeah, that's a good one. Or the fact that it was like 3am when I was writing. Cause that's at least true.

Hope you guys love the story, and I do indeed write week by week. So... sorry for any bumps in the flow. But hey, Charles Dickens wrote week by week for a newspaper. So... yeah.

[Blackfish]

You are absolutely correct. But I thought of a great excuse. Since these were nightmares, it was choppy. Yeah, that's a good one. Or the fact that it was like 3am when I was writing. Cause that's at least true.

Hope you guys love the story, and I do indeed write week by week. So... sorry for any bumps in the flow. But hey, Charles Dickens wrote week by week for a newspaper. So... yeah.
Haha, I totally understand. Writing that late gets real interesting, the probablility of thinking something and then imagining you wrote it down goes up a lot after 2, usually :)

Keep up the great story, but please for the love of all that is good don't start writing like Dickens >.< /hate authors who got paid by the word.

[Azurewrath]

Dickens got paid by the word ? That explains all the useless drivel and the abundance of short words :D

I thought the whole move from celebration to carnage was ... dynamic, not choppy. Who sits around and wonders about the freak storm when you've made a discovery that'll make you bigger than lord Carnavon ? It happened in an instant, nobody ever noticed that the dogs peowling the area and coming at them were weird, because the idea didn't compute so they eliminated it altogether. Things like a gloomy feel in the air that alerts you to the impending danger works best in movies, not stories.

Keep writing ! It doesn't really matter when you write it as long as it's coherent.

[Blackfish]

Dickens got paid by the word ? That explains all the useless drivel and the abundance of short words :D
Exxxxactly. Pretty lame on his part if you ask me, but such is the life of the starving, overly verbose artist.

I thought the whole move from celebration to carnage was ... dynamic, not choppy.
I agree, I think what I meant to say is that the wording in the transition was choppy. The tone is great and is very jarring, just like a sudden attack would be - but right around the attack the wording gets a bit less coherent and more awkward for a few sentences. Like I said it's really not a big deal, this is just me being VERY picky because he said he wanted suggestions. And that's about the worst I could come up with ;) so I meant it as praise wrapped up in constructive criticism.

[Half-Dragon]

he said he wanted suggestions
Indeed, I would like suggestions from everyone and anyone. Anything to help my writing. I think I have a pretty good handle on the story- where it's going and such- but criticism on my style is appreciated.

Thanks again, anyone who reads it.

[Azurewrath]

Thanks for not charging us money to read it :D

[Half-Dragon]

Oh no, I'm charging you. It's $5 a word- everytime you read it. It comes right out of your bank account.

[Azurewrath]

Ha ! Got you there ! I'm a minor, I can't have a bank account !!!

So, you can't charge me na na na na na na na .... O.O .....oh shit ....O.o .... mom and dad.

OMG OMG What have you done ?

[Draklar]

But i also can't wait to hear more about Xander and maybe even a little about Dahvid, even though he sounds like a bum.

I am not... I mean, Dahvid is not a bum.